Oh, the things we learn from our children. Parenting, it seems, is more than just learning how to put on a diaper--which can be tricky with a newborn boy who aims and fires every time cold air hits his..aimer--and how to feed a finicky eater. I think I've learned more from my munchkins then they could ever learn from me. For example...
Last night was a rough night in the King house. Two little boys who had no intention of going down (to bed) without a serious fight. So fight we did. Two hour battle. Neither side surrendered until the Sandman (with a touch of Benadryl--and yes it was prescribed) took the oldest out. Grant hung on admirably, finally pulling out the heavy artillery. "Mommy, I hav-a go potty". He knows we are trying to potty train him, which he refuses to do during daylight hours, but we can't tell him to pee in the potty during the day and just go in his diaper at night. So, with a self-satisfied smirk, another battle won, he glided past us into his bathroom leaving us to lick our wounds.
Every two minutes we would ask him..."G, you done yet?" and hear "No, my poo won't come out." We tried to explain that when pottying is used as a decoy and not a real need, sometimes things don't come out...no response. After about 15 minutes we heard shouting coming from the bathroom. A new battle had begun. Grant was crouched on the potty pointing at his bum and yelling "Get in the potty, poo! Now!" My son, the Poo Whisperer. My pride know no bounds.
After composing ourselves and again trying to explain how bodies function, Grant finally, indignantly retired for the evening. But oh, that it DID work like that.
"Get off my thighs, cellulite, right now!"--hello skinny jeans
"Get off my legs, hair, this minute!"--goodbye razor burn
"Get out of my brain, anxiety and depression, leave me alone now!"--Hello sweet sanity
Grant can't poo on command because that's not how the body works. There is a process involved. Liposuction is possible, but it's not permanent. If you still eat cheeseburgers and cheesecake, it'll come back with a vengeance. Weight loss involves a LIFE change. I can't rid my head of all it's problems with a snap of my fingers because it's a process.
There is function in the process.God help me if I know what that function is at the moment, but I know it exists. With Easter around the corner, I'm reminded that God could have snapped his fingers and allowed Jesus to die quickly, painlessly, but there is purpose in the cross.
Whatever it is you are going through right now, I don't know what it is, but there is a purpose. It's there for a great reason and, like poo, it may not be pretty, but it's necessary.
....PS...Please don't tell Grant I told you any of this. He's liable to go on a potty strike.
